Have you ever heard that quote, “You have the same number of hours in the day as Beyonce?”
Whenever I hear that, it makes me think of Queen Bey, looking fine as her glowy skinned self….WITH A TEAM OF ASSISTANTS AND HOUSEKEEPERS AND HELPERS supporting her every move.
So yes, while we all have the same number of hours in the day as Beyonce, we do not all have the resources that come along with being a major music mogul.
But, you do have more time than you think you do. Today, let’s drop the scary comparisons and bust a few myths around time, giving you more of it for the things that nourish you.
Before we begin, if you haven’t signed up for my free upcoming video series, 3 Key Steps To Managing Your Emotions So You Can Feel Like Yourself Again, register here.
The myth of time scarcity
A lot of us have an unhealthy mantra running through our minds: There’s Not Enough Time There’s Not Enough Time There’s Not Enough Time.
There’s actually plenty of time… for the things that matter.
Feeling like there aren’t enough hours in the day is another form of scarcity — fear there’s never enough. And while taking control of your time is a noble idea, this easily turns into controlling life, which only makes us more rigid.
The tighter we grip, the faster our day evaporates. Tensed up with a tight schedule, a single mishap destroys our carefully laid plans.
Our lives feel like sand slipping through an hour glass, piece by piece. We watch helplessly as years pass by, never able to find space for the things we want to do.
Meditate daily? When? Practice yoga? Yeah, right. Follow your dreams? Maybe tomorrow.
How to stop feeling like you don’t have enough time
The stress that builds as we grip time separates us from the present moment.
Instead of living our lives, we’re spending time all right, but not on the things that create joy or move our lives forward. Instead, we spend energy on the very things we want to escape from: stress, doubt, fear and worry.
Or we do things because we feel obligated and not because we want to.
The answer isn’t to do more, but to do less. To invest time instead of spend it.
To prioritize what really matters so that, “I don’t have the time,” turns into, “I choose to make the time.” Or, “I choose to not make the time.”
A mentor of mine says overwhelm is an absence of clarity. We’re always saying yes to something. The question is, what are you saying yes to?
A great way to create more time is to invest in practices like meditation, personal development and yoga.
Spiritual practices creates mindfulness. Without mindfulness, days speed by in a blur. We’re thinking about tomorrow or next week or last week or last year, never fully appreciating the vastness of time, space and energy that’s available right now.
Many people want quick fixes for big problems without understanding that sometimes you need to slow down to speed up.
We need to create space to lay a strong foundation and then maintain it — whether that’s through healing or learning new skills or just taking time to rest and restore.
Otherwise it’s like we’re on the Titanic, filling up buckets of water and throwing them out into the sea without fixing the gaping hole left by an iceberg.
How do you spend your time?
If you’re on the Titanic, you might panic that you don’t have time to fix the real problem — but do you have time not to?
Consider for a minute the proverbial buckets of water in your life. Where are you treading water without making actual progress? Where are you choosing to spend energy that doesn’t serve you?
Common time-wasters are:
Worry, doubt and fear.
Worrying eats an absurd amount of life.
If you have no idea how much time you spend in worry, doubt or fear, I invite you to track it. Notice how many minutes, even hours, of your day worry steals.
Sometimes before sitting to meditate, I worry about feeling bored. When those concerns arise, I always remind myself of this: If I can spend 10 minutes worrying or planning, I can definitely spend 10 minutes meditating.
To shift, become mindful. Recognize when you’re trapped in the cycle. Know yourself enough to understand that hey, I’m going to sit here for the next 10 minutes thinking or worrying, and the last time I did that, I was really frustrated with myself.
So today, I choose differently.
(Sneak peak alert! This is one of the emotional empowerment techniques I teach — using the memory of emotion to inspire change. Sign up for the free video training here!)
Social media and technology
Between Facebook, Instagram, Google, Pinterest and YouTube, a lot of us spend time living vicariously through other people’s lives, comparing ourselves and wishing that things were different. More perfect. Easier.
Maybe you’re a dreamer who lives in her head and uses the identity of a dreamer to avoid facing risk in the real world. Dreams are safe but they’re not meant to stay in your heart. They’re meant for you to take action and live the reality!
Or maybe you look outside yourself for all the answers. Spending 20 minutes on Google for “how to find my life purpose,” instead of looking within, meditating or journaling.
Choosing to spend time on technology becomes a way to protect yourself from risk. A way to fill your time so you don’t have face failure or even deeper, face yourself.
To shift, identify one step you can take toward following the whisper of your heart. It can be something really small, even writing a poem!
People pleasing / too many expectations
How many things do you do that you don’t want to do, but feel like you should? How many expectations for your life are truly yours and not ones you took on from society or other people?
To reclaim your relationship with time, you must ruthlessly edit the things others expect of you. Reclaim your power and realize that every thing you do is a choice.
Sometimes we must do things we don’t want to, but that’s still a choice.
Give, but give because you want to, not because you feel like you have to. Give, but don’t be afraid to ask for help. Notice the guilt you feel for taking time for yourself, but do it anyway.
We’re always saying yes to something. What yeses are causing you to say no to yourself?
This is a life-long journey of unwinding the guilt that comes from setting boundaries. Of learning to ask for help and understanding that you’re worthy of receiving it.
Of learning that it’s okay to create space. We’re human beings, not human doings and taking time to be is an essential ingredient for joy.
To shift, meditate for at least five minutes a day. It’ll help you learn when to say yes and when to say no.
The truth about investing time
When you spend time meditating or practicing yoga or taking spiritual courses or reading mind- and heart-expanding books, you’re not spending time — you’re investing it.
Have you ever heard this quote? “You should sit in meditation for 20 minutes a day unless you’re too busy. Then you should sit for an hour.”
This means that spiritual practices expand time by making you more mindful.
We switch from constantly reacting and feeling overwhelmed to responding in a more powerful, precise way. This isn’t a controlling type of power, but the true power that comes from connecting to the universe.
These practices help us worry less, trust more and ride the flow of life so that we’re not wasting all our time gripping. In relaxation, everything comes.
Tuned into ourselves, we can better understand when to say yes and when to say no and when to say nothing and create space instead.
If you’re waiting for a practice that can fit in your schedule, or for life to finally calm down so you can take the class or read the book or start the blog, you’ll be waiting forever.
Life is vast and we are small containers
We must mindfully choose which streams of life we want to allow into our containers. This is our choice, our power.
You do not find the time or save the time — you create space to experience it.
And then you’ll always have enough.
If you’d like to invest the time to learn about how to manage your emotions in a free video series starting on Wednesday, click here to sign up!
I hope this served you.
All the best,
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