- in Books , Into The World , Life Purpose , Mindset
It’s not about getting what you want, but creating it

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A big mindset shift is taking place within my soul as I go big and create my dreams, and I want to share this with you, as I share all of my inner shifts to become the person I’m meant to be.
And it’s this — I create my dreams. This life I’m building is one of creation, not one that’s handed down to me because I’m lucky or I get opportunities or get anything from the universe or anything outside of me.
It’s happening because I show up every day, move toward the life I desire, and consciously unwind doubts, fears and limiting beliefs, healing the wounds I need to but also realizing that some things aren’t a huge whirlwind of healing, but only a matter of choosing differently.
This is why a lot of people stay in awareness mode without their lives changing.
If you understand all the ways you’re messed up but still haven’t been able to make a powerful shift, there’s likely a part of you that’s still waiting for a magic eraser to change your past, make people treat you differently, or life to give you a different result from the sheer realization.
But realizations don’t change our lives. The fresh approach and actions that follow the realizations do. If you realize something and then immediately return to your old habits and behaviors, nothing will change.
This life, our results, the fruits of our labor, it’s what we choose to create, not what we get.
We have so much power to co-create our lives, and a lot of times there’s immense fear that we won’t get what we want.
And while life is full of twists and turns, losses and defeats, ultimately our results are a matter of what we choose to create.
I’m reading a really great book right now by Grant Cardone called The 10x Rule, and he talks about how the reason why so many people fail to achieve their goals is because they under-estimate the amount of effort it will take to achieve them.
Besides effort, people underestimate the amount of adversity we need to overcome, Cardone says.
This was so affirming to me because one of the changing points along my journey was when I realized that although I feel all the feelings, the one feeling I wasn’t allowing myself to feel was disappointment.
Whenever things didn’t go well, I resisted the disappointment, which prevented it from moving through, which kept me in a negative thought spiral, mindlessly reacting from fear and repressed disappointment instead of an empowered place of confidence.
Earlier this year during a launch, I remember standing in the shower, the water pouring over me, as I realized — oh my God…
I resist disappointment.
The launch wasn’t going that well — the middle is always really tough emotionally — but I didn’t understand that as normal yet because I was still relatively new at this.
In that moment, I felt the disappointment, allowed myself to fully cry and release and acknowledge all my fears of failure, fears that my dreams wouldn’t come true, fears that I was a failure, and that after this, I wouldn’t even be able to get a job because I’ve pasted my crazy thoughts and feelings all over the Internet, and if anyone were to Google me, I’d surely be ruined.
I felt those feelings, and for the first time in my life acknowledged that all those bullshit stories weren’t truths. They were only random, flying, surface thoughts emanating from the disappointment I wasn’t allowing myself to feel.
The water pouring over my head washed my tears away and the feeling of empowerment that followed was like nothing I’d ever felt.
Finally, for the first time in my life, I wasn’t backing down.
I wasn’t buying into the lie that success and dream chasing and an amazing life was for other people, and not me.
I got out of that shower, toweled myself off, and scheduled more emails to my community letting them know about my amazing course I’d poured my heart and soul into and that they could join and experience transformation.
Confidence comes from facing failure and continuing on anyway.
Confidence only gets stronger as we walk the path of creating our dreams, encounter doubt, fear and failure, and then continue on anyway.
Most people erroneously consider adversity as proof their dream is not meant to be. It’s just not true. Adversity and disappointment is inevitable.
During these times, we need to summon our inner strength, reaffirm to ourselves that this matters. It’s what you want. It’s your dream. And you’ve got to do the inner work necessary — whatever is called, whether it’s mindset work or healing old wounds or feeling feelings or whatever — and continue on anyway.
It’s not about getting what you want.
It’s about creating it.
And as long as I don’t give up, as long as I keep taking action —
I can create anything I want. And so can you.
All that’s required is that you decide to believe.
I hope this resonated with you. If it did, please share your thoughts in the comments below and click the share buttons.
And remember,
Love hard and live free to become who you’re meant to be,
Suzanne
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